I was inspired to write this post by an article I just read on one of my new favorite websites: hardballtimes.com. The article was about the unevenness in interleague play. Now, interleague play has changed a lot since it started back when I was in Mr. Berkowitz's class in tenth grade. I remember it was that year because I wrote my very best high school essay in that class, and it was about what? You guessed it, interleague play. Anyway, the point of the article on hardballtimes.com was that interleague play is unfair. The example they use compares the Florida Marlins to the Atlanta Braves, who are both in the race for the National League East crown. This season, the Braves had to play six games against the Boston Red Sox (.623 winning percentage), three games against the Detroit Tigers (.592), Minnesota Twins (.513), and Cleveland Indians (.584). Meanwhile, the Marlins were able to play in the sandbox with the Tampa Bay Devil Rays (.434) six times, and with the Cleveland Indians (.584), Kansas City Royals (.418), and Chicago White Sox (.432) three times each. How exactly is that fair?
Anyway, that's not the point of this discussion; I made my interleague rant in a good old fashioned five paragraph essay nine years ago. Here, I would like to discuss the pros and cons of the designated hitter. For the unenlightened (I seem to have written that prepositional phrase several times recently), the American League allows teams to replace their pitchers in their starting lineups with players who will only hit and not play the field (see "Papi, Big" or "Ortiz, David"), while the National League requires their pitchers to bat. This forces National League managers to come up with elaborate ways of avoiding a relatively sure out in key situations, e.g. a double switch. Par exemple, there are two outs in the seventh inning, and Willie Randolph wants to bring in Pedro Feliciano to face a left-handed hitter to get the final out, but he doesn't want to waste him on just one batter; he wants to use Feliciano to at least start the eighth inning. However, Willie doesn't want to have the pitcher bat, and the pitcher's spot in the lineup is coming up second next inning. Az Willie will do a double switch, wherein the seventh batter in the Mets' lineup, Jose Valentin, who made the last out of the previous inning, will be replaced in the lineup with the new pitcher Feliciano, and in the field by Ruben Gotay, who will take John Maine's spot in the lineup. There, not too hard. This doesn't happen in the American League. In fact, it's quite common for an American League lineup to remain the same for the entire game while the pitchers can get switched all the time. Onto the pros and cons (mostly cons)! Well, I sorta only have one minor pro and one major con.
Pro: Good hitting is almost always more exciting than good pitching. Watching the 7-8-9 hitters in a National League game is often a waste of time.
HUGE CON: Let's pretend for a second that the planets align, and Jesus returns once again to save our mortal souls, and the Mets end up meeting the Red Sox in the World Series. (I'm only using the Sox here instead of the Yankees because the Yanks have been inundated with injuries and I have no idea who will be playing DH for them down the road.) When they play at Fenway Park where American League rules apply, the Sox will be able to use their usual lineup, including Kevin Youkilis at first base, and Big Papi at DH. Meanwhile the Mets will be forced to use one of these scrubs: 712 year old Julio Franco, Damian Easley, Ricky Ledee, Ramon Castro, and the aforementioned Ruben Gotay. Now, when they play at Shea, both pitchers will bat, while Big Papi will probably play first, and Youk will either play out of position or come off the bench. Basically, the point of the argument is that all American League rosters have a DH built into them, while it would be a colossal waste of money for an NL team to carry an extra guy like that (those DH's rates are pretendous. See Fan Costume Commentary from '03 on homestarrunner.com). Anyway, I think this scenario gives American League teams a more than negligible advantage over NL teams when they play at their home parks.
If anyone wants to argue with me, please do so; I can't wait to have an answer for every criticism you throw at me. Man, I love arguing about baseball.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
A Couple More and Another Bizarre Anecdote
Somehow I managed to get some feedback from my last post on my facebook wall. See, this puts me in a bit of a quandary, because I definitely want to transmit what that person said, but by doing so, I would be violating one of the primary statutes of this blog. Quite the conundrum in which you've put me, young lady I barely know. I have it! I'll just hide the wall post so no one will be able to see it. Anywho, the things she suggested I add to my ever-growing list of brand-name products are as follows: Scotch Tape and Chapstick. Now, I associate Scotch Tape only with the clear kind of adhesive, although I'm quite certain they make other forms, like masking tape, painting tape, and electrical tape. But everyone calls the clear stuff "Scotch Tape." I don't even think I need to mention that nobody in their right mind would ever ask if they could borrow some lip balm. What do you think?
Now this anecdote took place a few hours ago in the big Aitch at the Ar-Aitch-Ar's where a bunch of us were watching "Az You Think You Can Dance." At one point, our hostess asked the other girls there what size shoes they wear. As it turned out, she bought a pair of shoes that fit her well at the store, but didn't fit so well once she got home. They ended up fitting her friend perfectly, az she sold them to her. The first thing I thought was "there's no way that would ever happen with guys." I just can't imagine a scenario in which I would buy some gym shoes and then sell them to my friend. It was pure comedy. Anyway, I'm pleased that Hok and Jaime received rave reviews for their bizarrely choreographed quasi-jazz routine. Hopefully they'll be safe tomorrow night. Layla Tov.
Now this anecdote took place a few hours ago in the big Aitch at the Ar-Aitch-Ar's where a bunch of us were watching "Az You Think You Can Dance." At one point, our hostess asked the other girls there what size shoes they wear. As it turned out, she bought a pair of shoes that fit her well at the store, but didn't fit so well once she got home. They ended up fitting her friend perfectly, az she sold them to her. The first thing I thought was "there's no way that would ever happen with guys." I just can't imagine a scenario in which I would buy some gym shoes and then sell them to my friend. It was pure comedy. Anyway, I'm pleased that Hok and Jaime received rave reviews for their bizarrely choreographed quasi-jazz routine. Hopefully they'll be safe tomorrow night. Layla Tov.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
A New One
Remember my post from October 12th about brands that have cornered the market on particular products? Here's the link: http://schmuttblog.blogspot.com/2006/10/funny-anecdote-and-thoughts-about.html
Anyway, I was just discussing with my friend that I need to get new wheels for my roller blades, and it occurred to me that this is another example. Rollerblade is actually a registered trademark brand name of inline skates. And nobody, but nobody, ever refers to inline skates as "inline skates." Everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY just calls them "Roller Blades." Kudos to their marketing department.
And speaking of bestowing praise on marketing departments, aren't the bus advertisements for "Live Free Die Hard" the best ones you've ever seen? For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, the ad is a black background with white text saying "YIPPEE KI YAY M(" with a bible type reference below it that says "John 6:27." Absolutely brilliant! "Yippee ki yay mother-f**ker" was John McClane's catchphrase from the original Die Hard, which incidentally is one of the two movies I know mamash by heart (the other being the first Matrix). And obviously the "6:27" refers to the opening date. Few ads have ever gotten me as excited as that one. Can't wait for Wednesday night. I'm positively giddy.
Anyway, I was just discussing with my friend that I need to get new wheels for my roller blades, and it occurred to me that this is another example. Rollerblade is actually a registered trademark brand name of inline skates. And nobody, but nobody, ever refers to inline skates as "inline skates." Everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY just calls them "Roller Blades." Kudos to their marketing department.
And speaking of bestowing praise on marketing departments, aren't the bus advertisements for "Live Free Die Hard" the best ones you've ever seen? For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, the ad is a black background with white text saying "YIPPEE KI YAY M(" with a bible type reference below it that says "John 6:27." Absolutely brilliant! "Yippee ki yay mother-f**ker" was John McClane's catchphrase from the original Die Hard, which incidentally is one of the two movies I know mamash by heart (the other being the first Matrix). And obviously the "6:27" refers to the opening date. Few ads have ever gotten me as excited as that one. Can't wait for Wednesday night. I'm positively giddy.
In Support of Traditional Baseball Statistics
Now, as many of you know, I am a staunch supporter of progressive thinking in baseball. I recently reread "Moneyball" by Michael Lewis (which I have to return to my friend before he kills me), and now more than ever I still can't understand why Sabermetric statistics aren't more popular. For the unenlightened, "Sabermetrics" comes from "SABR," which is an acronym for The Society of American Baseball Research. Members of this brotherhood, founded by the immortal Bill James himself, have devoted themselves to creating a new system for determining the value of each and every action on a baseball field. To them, the most important traditional baseball statistics are On-Base Percentage, determined by adding together hits and walks, and then dividing that by at-bats plus walks, and Slugging Percentage, which is determined by dividing total bases by at-bats. By factoring these two statistics into various equations, they have created brand new statistics, which are intended to evaluate players as accurately as possible. Among these new statistics are VORP (Value Over Replacement Player, in terms of cumulative runs), WARP3 (Wins Above Replacement Player, in terms of cumulative wins), OPS+ (On-Base + Slugging as compared to the league average, taking into account the stadium and the era), BABIP (Batting Average on Balls In Play, excluding strikeouts and home runs), and for fielding, FRAA (Fielding Runs Above Average, in terms of cumulative runs). These statistics minimize, or even eliminate any reliability on team performance, which is in direct contrast to traditional statistics such as Runs Batted In, and Runs Scored. Az in this day and age, in the post-modern era, why are the statistics we see the most still the standard Batting Average, Runs Batted In, Stolen Bases, Runs Scored, Home Runs, etc.? Whatever the answer is, I've come up with my own reasons:
1. As an avid fan of Fantasy Baseball, these traditional statistics are essential. The average fan doesn't have the tools to be able to calculate most of the new-fangled ones. If I had my way, I would create a fantasy league in which the only batting statistics would be HRs, OBP, OPS, SLG, and Walks. But those stats are essentially all the same, az it would be meaningless. RBI, AVG, and SBs add more strategy; a below-average player like Juan Pierre, who hits 0 HRs, only hits singles, never walks, and steals a ton of bases, becomes a huge fantasy commodity. Fantasy Baseball is just more fun when you account for all of these stats.
2. The baseball records are some of the most hallowed numbers in all of sports. 73, 755, .420, and 191 are numbers that have lives of their own (For the unenlightened, 73 is the single season Home Run record held by Barry Bonds, 755 is the career Home Run record held by Henry Aaron, .420 is the single season Batting Average record held by Ty Cobb, and 191 is the single season RBI record held by Hack Wilson). If we were to start minimizing the importance of these traditional numbers, we would be minimizing the greatness of the feats of those players.
3. If we only paid attention to WARP3, VORP, and FRAA, then the winners of awards like Most Valuable Player and the Gold Glove would cease to be determined by votes. They would easily be given to the players who were tops in these categories. I'm not saying this is a bad thing; I just think it would minimize the excitement.
Anyway, we'll return to regular Schmutter inanity shortly.
1. As an avid fan of Fantasy Baseball, these traditional statistics are essential. The average fan doesn't have the tools to be able to calculate most of the new-fangled ones. If I had my way, I would create a fantasy league in which the only batting statistics would be HRs, OBP, OPS, SLG, and Walks. But those stats are essentially all the same, az it would be meaningless. RBI, AVG, and SBs add more strategy; a below-average player like Juan Pierre, who hits 0 HRs, only hits singles, never walks, and steals a ton of bases, becomes a huge fantasy commodity. Fantasy Baseball is just more fun when you account for all of these stats.
2. The baseball records are some of the most hallowed numbers in all of sports. 73, 755, .420, and 191 are numbers that have lives of their own (For the unenlightened, 73 is the single season Home Run record held by Barry Bonds, 755 is the career Home Run record held by Henry Aaron, .420 is the single season Batting Average record held by Ty Cobb, and 191 is the single season RBI record held by Hack Wilson). If we were to start minimizing the importance of these traditional numbers, we would be minimizing the greatness of the feats of those players.
3. If we only paid attention to WARP3, VORP, and FRAA, then the winners of awards like Most Valuable Player and the Gold Glove would cease to be determined by votes. They would easily be given to the players who were tops in these categories. I'm not saying this is a bad thing; I just think it would minimize the excitement.
Anyway, we'll return to regular Schmutter inanity shortly.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
A Series of Fortunate Events
Now that I've been getting comments about my lack of posts, and now that I have what to write about, I'mma go ahead and bring y'all up to date. I've determined that I have arrived at my current state as a result of several seemingly unrelated events. I came to this conclusion mostly because it makes for a good story, but forget that for a second and allow yourselves to be immersed in my heroic tale. It begins on an unremarkable Sunday about 3 months ago. I had planned to go with a couple of friends to Tanger outlets by Riverhead, NY to buy some clothes. For no particular reason, I felt a not-so-weak urge to try on a pair of jeans. I tried them on, but I didn't necessarily like the way I looked in them, az I just returned them to the rack. However, during the same shopping trip, I made another drastic change in my wardrobe. I won't say exactly what the change was, but let's just say, only my roommates would ever notice.
Let's fast-forward to like three weeks ago. I had decided when I quit my old job, that I would avoid getting myself into a certain situation, because it would cost money, and generally be irresponsible. I abandoned that policy three weeks ago because of extenuating circumstances. I decided that it was time for a new Schmutter. Anyway, during the time I was waiting to hear the results of my endeavor, I ended up taking another trip out to Tanger outlets. While I was there, not only did I replenish my supply of unmentionables, but I proceeded once again to try on a pair of jeans. This time there was no stopping me. I learned later that if you want to buy a pair of jeans there's no better place to go than the Gap, but this is a learning experience for me, az give me some time to get used to my Van Heusens. That was just another step forward in Operation: Reinvent My Image. Anywho, a day or so after that I heard that my attempts at getting into that situation I was trying to avoid had resulted in failure. Either way, I didn't feel too badly about it; at least I was trying to do things differently.
Meanwhile, I was still on the job hunt, and my mother was determined to do her share in helping me, az she took me to get an interview suit last Friday. We made the rounds around midtown. First we went to Syms and I tried on a few suits, but mom decided she didn't want me to have a cheap suit, az we left. Then we tried Men's Wearhouse and Joseph A. Bank, but to no avail. Finally, at mom's urging, we went into Brooks Brothers. Needless to say, after lots of arguing, I relented and let mom buy me the most expensive piece of clothing I've ever owned. Now, equipped with a new attitude and a new wardrobe, I was ready to face the world.
Before my most recent round of interviews I received some other welcome news. A certain event, which I was certain would take place, finally had. (Notice I'm being deliberately vague about a lot of the specifics in this post, but that just stems from the fact that I don't talk about specific events in my personal life. Just deal with it.) Armed with that knowledge, I was in an extremely good mood when I went into an interview on Wednesday. And just like that, new suit and all, I got a job. After all my efforts, this job just fell into my lap over a period of 32 hours. Az starting Monday, I'll be a portfolio performance analyst for United States Trust. And this wasn't a moment too soon, because tutoring season is almost over. Great timing. Anyway, I guess the only thing I need to worry about is asking them to change my computer system to Dvorak. Ah well. It's just what I need; all my co-workers are gonna think they hired a raving lunatic. Maybe they have...
Let's fast-forward to like three weeks ago. I had decided when I quit my old job, that I would avoid getting myself into a certain situation, because it would cost money, and generally be irresponsible. I abandoned that policy three weeks ago because of extenuating circumstances. I decided that it was time for a new Schmutter. Anyway, during the time I was waiting to hear the results of my endeavor, I ended up taking another trip out to Tanger outlets. While I was there, not only did I replenish my supply of unmentionables, but I proceeded once again to try on a pair of jeans. This time there was no stopping me. I learned later that if you want to buy a pair of jeans there's no better place to go than the Gap, but this is a learning experience for me, az give me some time to get used to my Van Heusens. That was just another step forward in Operation: Reinvent My Image. Anywho, a day or so after that I heard that my attempts at getting into that situation I was trying to avoid had resulted in failure. Either way, I didn't feel too badly about it; at least I was trying to do things differently.
Meanwhile, I was still on the job hunt, and my mother was determined to do her share in helping me, az she took me to get an interview suit last Friday. We made the rounds around midtown. First we went to Syms and I tried on a few suits, but mom decided she didn't want me to have a cheap suit, az we left. Then we tried Men's Wearhouse and Joseph A. Bank, but to no avail. Finally, at mom's urging, we went into Brooks Brothers. Needless to say, after lots of arguing, I relented and let mom buy me the most expensive piece of clothing I've ever owned. Now, equipped with a new attitude and a new wardrobe, I was ready to face the world.
Before my most recent round of interviews I received some other welcome news. A certain event, which I was certain would take place, finally had. (Notice I'm being deliberately vague about a lot of the specifics in this post, but that just stems from the fact that I don't talk about specific events in my personal life. Just deal with it.) Armed with that knowledge, I was in an extremely good mood when I went into an interview on Wednesday. And just like that, new suit and all, I got a job. After all my efforts, this job just fell into my lap over a period of 32 hours. Az starting Monday, I'll be a portfolio performance analyst for United States Trust. And this wasn't a moment too soon, because tutoring season is almost over. Great timing. Anyway, I guess the only thing I need to worry about is asking them to change my computer system to Dvorak. Ah well. It's just what I need; all my co-workers are gonna think they hired a raving lunatic. Maybe they have...
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