So I came up with a couple of new driving pet-peeves, which I'm sure everyone is just dying to know. You know how there are "turn only" and "exit only" lanes all over the place? Well they're there for a bloody reason! If you are in one of those lanes you better freakin' do what the signs tell you to do. If you're headed southbound on the Harlem River Drive and you're driving in the right lane near 125th street that is "exit only" onto the Triboro Bridge, then you sure as hell better be getting onto that bridge. If you decide to be cool and use that lane to get ahead of the traffic in the other two non-"exit only" lanes, then all you're doing is creating a problem. You're going to cut off someone in the middle lane, and while you're waiting to cut in you're preventing the people behind you from actually getting on the bridge; a privelege they have earned by being in the correct lane and by shelling out the six dollars for the toll. Honestly, I couldn't care less if getting on the Triboro Bridge costs you six dollars you don't have and takes you an hour out of your way; wait in traffic in the left two lanes like everybody else. The only way you are allowed to break this rule is if you're not going to screw anybody else. If there are few cars on the road (at maybe 4:00 am) then be my guest. Otherwise, make sure you're in the correct lane. You know the intersection on 96th street and 1st avenue? I've mentioned it before because it's a horrible traffic light situation what with all the traffic getting on and off the FDR Drive. Anyway if you're driving east on 96th street, the right lane is "right turn only" going towards York Avenue. I once saw a guy try to cut into the traffic going onto the FDR from that lane, but a traffic cop wouldn't let him and forced him to make the turn. It was outstanding.
Now this one really pisses me off. U-turns are illegal in most places, and I admit that I have made many U-turns in my day. However, as with most things, I have no problem with people making U-turns as long as you're not screwing anybody else. Make a U-turn when no one is around. However, inasumch as they are illegal, don't start your U-turn when there are cars coming at you from the other direction. You see, this is the opposite of "not screwing anybody else." Never has this bothered me more than yesterday evening. I had to go to the cleaners on Ft. Washington Avenue to drop off my tuxedo before driving home to the East Side, az I drove up Overlook Terrace towards Ft. Wash. Now Overlook Terrace is one lane in each direction, i.e. an inopportune place to make a U-turn. Believe it or not, a car coming down the hill started to make a U-turn just as I got there; I literally had to slam on the breaks. Okay fine, I wasn't in a terrible hurry, whatever. Now a plain old K-turn should get the job done, but this driver was so incompetent that it was more like a pentagram-turn. Hey, just as a little tip, don't be afraid to get up close and personal with the parked cars. You don't need to start reversing when you're 10 feet away from the next car; keep on going until you're a foot away. That way you won't have to change directions 84 times to turn around (a la Austin Powers). At that point I started honking the guy. And then you know what he did? He actually decided better of things and began undoing his K-turn. Az after switching from Drive to Reverse countless times, he ended up going in the same direction as when he started. Needless to say, I was displeased.
Now onto baseball. I was reading baseballmusings.com yesterday, and Pinto wrote a post about Ryan Ludwick, the St. Louis Cardinals outfielder who hit his twelfth home run. He noted that "his .767 slugging percentage is more than twice his .342 batting average, meaning his average hit is more than a double." So that's pretty cool. Since I'm obsessed with slugging percentage these days I decided to check last year's stats to see if anyone accomplished that feat last season. It turns out that among players who qualified for the batting title (bizarrely 3.1 plate appearances per team game, or 502 plate appearances over 162 games), six did it in 2007 (in reverse order):
Jim Thome: .275 AVG, .563 SLG, 119 Hits, 65 1B, 19 2B, 35 HR, totaling 2.042 bases-per-hit (BPH).
Alex Rodriguez: .314 AVG, .645 SLG, 183 Hits, 98 1B, 31 2B, 54 HR, totaling 2.055 BPH.
Adam Dunn: .264 AVG, .554 SLG, 138 Hits, 69 1B, 27 2B, 2 3B, 40 HR, totaling 2.094 BPH.
Prince Fielder: .288 AVG, .618 SLG, 165 Hits, 78 1B, 35 2B, 2 3B, 50 HR, totaling 2.145 BPH.
Ryan Howard: .268 AVG, .584 SLG, 142 Hits, 69 1B, 26 2B, 47 HR, totaling 2.176 BPH.
Carlos Pena: .282 AVG, .627 SLG, 138 Hits, 62 1B, 29 2B, 1 3B, 46 HR, totaling 2.225 BPH.
I would say A-Rod's feat is the most impressive because he's the only one who accomplished it with a batting average above .300. Let's see how these guys are doing this season (all stats through May 20th):
Jim Thome: .206 AVG, .418 SLG, 29 Hits, 15 1B, 6 2B, 8 HR, totaling 2.029 BPH.
A-Rod: Nope.
Adam Dunn: .234 AVG, .508 SLG, 32 Hits, 17 1B, 4 2B, 11 HR, totaling 2.171 BPH.
Prince Fielder: Nope.
Ryan Howard: .183 AVG, .396 SLG, 31 Hits, 16 1B, 4 2B, 1 3B, 10 HR, totaling 2.164 BPH.
Carlos Pena: Nope.
Just for fun, let's look at Jason Giambi: .204 AVG, .469 SLG, 23 Hits, 9 1B, 6 2B, 8 HR, 2.299 BPH. Wow!
And now, Lance Berkman, who is absolutely ripping it up so far: .388 AVG, .776 SLG, 66 Hits, 33 1B, 16 2B, 1 3B, 16 Hr, 2.000 BPH. Ridiculous.
Anyway, that was a fun exercise. Let's move on to the reason for this post, the retirement of Mike Piazza.
I don't think I need to go through the stats; he's clearly the greatest hitting catcher of all time, and he's a first ballot Hall-of-Famer. Everyone knows this. I want to share a couple of my own memories of him. A few posts ago I regaled you with the story of the eighth inning of a Mets game against the Braves on June 30th, 2000: "I remember watching the highlights and seeing the fans by the first base line going absolutely berserk. Piazza is running towards first base and when his batted ball clears the fence he pumps his right fist in boyish glee. Here's a guy who's making $90 million and he's going ballistic because he hit a ball over a fence during a game in June." Another one I remember vividly was a game on April 28th, 1999. I was watching it at my cousins' house in Connecticut. The Padres were the defending National League champions; they had lost the World Series to the Yankees in 1998. Trevor Hoffman, the Padres closer, had saved 23 consecutive games and was coming off a season in which he had saved 53 games with a 1.48 ERA. The Mets were down 3-2 in the ninth inning, and Piazza hit a monstrous home run to right field with John Olerud on first. Mets win 4-3.
It was such an unbelievable home run; the pitch was probably six inches outside and eight inches high, but nobody I ever watched could hit a ball the other way like Mike Piazza. Nobody got around on pitches with such incredible bat speed like Piazza (except Gary Sheffield). And when he hit a home run, he would scrunch up his face in a classic grimace. It was as though he was so excited to hit a home run but he didn't want to show it, so it turned into a snarl. I remember Roger Clemens beaning him in the head. I remember Clemens throwing the bat-head at him in the World Series. I remember his first hit as a met, an opposite field double into the gap. I remember being at my buddy's house in Great Neck on a Saturday night, when they announced the trade on Sports Center. I remember watching games at home and my grandma saying "that Mike Piazza... oooh is he good looking!" Mike, thanks for all the memories. I'll end with a quote from Mike as reported by the Associated Press: "But I have to say that my time with the Mets wouldn't have been the same without the greatest fans in the world," he said. "One of the hardest moments of my career was walking off the field at Shea Stadium and saying goodbye. My relationship with you made my time in New York the happiest of my career and for that, I will always be grateful."
